Heeeeeere Picky Picky

For all you degenerate gamblers out there, I have decided to post my weekly NFL picks. Most weeks the post will occur on Wed. due to the NFL running a game on Thurs on the NFL Network which no one seems to get anyway. Credentials? I don’t' need no stinkin' credentials. Ok let's get to it.

Week 10
PATS (-4) vs. Jets
The Pick: J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS. Farve seems to be more comfortable each week in the Jets offense and this will be a revenge game for them with first place in the division on the line. (If your going to the game get your galoshes out and take the under - Thanks Jameson)

GIANTS (-6.5) vs. Ravens
The Pick: G-men. Ride the high as long as you can. The Boys in Blue are on a season long roll and Flacco will be on his back-o all day long.

FALCONS (-5.5) vs. Broncos
The Pick: Hot-lanta. Simply put, the Broncos D is terrible. Broncos are 5-4 in a terrible division and the Falcons are 6-3 in a good one.

DOLPHINS (-10.5) vs. Raiders
The Pick: If this was the Raiderettes vs. the Miami cheerleaders (what are they called - the blow holes?) I would be all over the Raiders, but its not. This line scares the hell out of me though, but the Raiders haven't scored a touchdown in three weeks. I am betting against the silver and black until they cover. Take the Dolphins.

COLTS (-8.5) vs. Texans
The Pick: The line moved a full point since it opened at 9.5. Whats that tell me? That Joe Public is betting the Texans will cover. Meaning I will bet the opposite. Take the Colts who are on a roll and at home.

Titans (-3) vs. JAGUARS
The Pick: The Titans have to loose at some point...don't they? And usually I like home dogs. But this isn't the week they loose. My worst case scenario is Titans win in OT and if that’s the case they still push. Take them this week.

PACKERS (OFF) vs. Bears
The Pick: Um, basically a pick 'em game with Grossman possibly starting? Even if Orton starts he won’t be 100%. Take the Pack at home and watch money Lambeau Leap into your bank account.

Eagles (-9) vs. BENGALS
The Pick: Eagles are a good team. Just not a good enough team in their division (0-3). As long as Andy Reid doesn't screw up the play calling (uh, same run same side twice in a row on third and fourth down last week, nice one Andy) the Eagles should beat up on the lesser team.
*Side Bet* Take the under on years until Andy's sons go back to jail for probation violation. It doesn’t matter what the total is, just take the under.

Saints (-5.5) vs. CHIEFS
The Pick: "We play to win the game." They sure do, problem is the Chiefs aren't good enough on any level to win. Their best player is busy smashing the drink he just bought over a females head. Smooth move brotha. Their coach (Jose Valentine look-a-like) is just terrible. There is no way to gloss it over. Take the Saints.

PANTHERS (-14) vs. Lions
The Pick: I won't even waste my breath. If the line was 21 I would still take the Black Kittens. Panthers AND the over (39.5; they may score 40pts on their own).

BUCCANEERS (-3.5) vs. Vikings
The Pick: I am not sold on the Bucs or the Vikings. Bucs get to drive their broke down Cadillac again but it won’t matter. In order to win on the road you have to run the ball well. I am following all day AP. Take the Vikings.

49ERS (-6) vs. Rams
The Pick: Ugh! I have to pick this one? OK. Simple. Take the 49ers for this reason alone. If they don't win Mike Singletary might threaten to streak naked through the homes of all of them, except Vernon Davis, because we all know that Mike doesn’t want anyone who can't take a good streaking to be on his team. Take the 49ers and pretend your watching a high school game.

Cardinals (-3) vs. SEAHAWKS
The Pick: The Cardinals should have lost last week to the San Francisco Treats and Seabirds are an even worse team. Take Zona as my LOCK of the week.

STEELERS (-4.5) vs. Chargers
The Pick: The steel curtain has resembled more of a sheer nightgown recently. Big Ben’s clock as been rung too many times that I am not sure he knows he is in the NFL and not back at Miami of OH. I will take the Bolts here and hope LT has a big day.

Cowgirls (OFF) vs. REDSKINS
The Pick: From -2.5 to off? Hmmmmmmm. Here is the deal. If this wasn't Romo's first game back I would say take the Romosexuals and be on your way. But it is. So I am banking on a good outing from Portis and at least one pick by Hall. Take the Skins.

Monday Night
BILLS (-5) vs. Browns
The Pick: Love the moxy this Brady Quinn has. Bills can't get out of their own way recently and the Browns are getting closer. Take the Browns call it a week.

Home Team in CAPS.

***This is for gambling purposes only. If my pick is wrong I will not cover your debt. Sorry but your thumbs will heal eventually***