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Just Retire Already!

ESPN - A source close to Brett Favre said the quarterback, pending a physical, will sign a contract with the Minnesota Vikings for between $10 million to $12 million, according to ESPN senior NFL analyst Chris Mortensen.

When will this end?! I am so sick of it. He's retired, he isn't retired, oh wait he is retired again.....now he isn't retired?! God Brett, get a fucking life. No one cares anymore. And if last year was any indication, you should stay retired. What kind of game are you trying to play? I am even sick writing about this.

As far as I am concerned, the NY Giants ended your career two years ago in Lambeau. You should have done so as well.

McThree-Some

TMZ - The newest celebrity XXX tape has already hit the Internet -- a threesome -- this one featuring "Grey's Anatomy" star Eric Dane, his wife Rebecca Gayheart and a former beauty queennamed Kari Ann Peniche.

Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart did not have sex with Kari Ann Peniche -- but according to Peniche, they had plenty of fun. Kari Ann -- a dethroned Miss United States Teen -- tells TMZ the video featuring the whacked-out naked trio was shot more than two years ago in her apartment. Kari Ann insists there was absolutely no sex involved -- they played dress up and the two women then soaked together in a bathtub as Eric called "action" behind the camera. In the video, Gayheart says her "alter-ego" name is "Nina," Kari's is "Fifi" and Dane goes by "Peter," "Cocaine Manner," "Tristan Daily," and "Tuff Hedeman," a famous bull rider.

So, let me get this straight. Two smokin hot chicks, one dude, booze, weed, nakedness, two women in a bathtub, and alter egos, but absolutely no sex? What the F ever! There is no way I believe that these three didn't bang. Absolutely no way. Is "plenty of fun" supposed to mean they played with barbie and dress up? I didn't see any clothes on them so what dress up could there be? I for one am insulted that these three think that just because there was no sex on camera the general public can't infer what really happened. Let's put it this way, either Eric Dane plowed both those chicks or this was the biggest cock tease to a man ever. And if THAT was the case, I just don't see how this guy could stay married to the ultimate tease. If a tree falls in the woods but no one is there to hear it does it make a noise? Your god damn right it does.

Oh You Dirty Girl

NY DAILY NEWS - Peephole-camera victim Erin Andrews is posing for dirty pictures - this time with her consent.

The ESPN college football reporter slopped on gobs of mud and a pair of shoulder pads for a GQ magazine photo spread (click here for more at GQ.com).

Surrounded by beefy gridiron grunts in equally muddy attire, Andrews, 31, posed like one of the boys in a sweaty locker room wearing smeared grease paint under her eyes.

Cleaned up for another shot, Andrews, voted "America's Sexiest Sportscaster" by Playboy Magazine, stands atop a Gatorade cooler in a thigh-high skirt with a mic in her hands.
In an interview with GQ, the Atlanta-based sidelines babe says she's moving to New York. "I have no ties to Atlanta, so ideally, I'll get there ASAP and start playing," she said.

Erin, oh Erin - I know you must have been traumatized by PeepGate. What lovely smokin hot blond wouldn't (maybe Heidi Pratt)? Let me be the first to say that we here at I Really Didn't Say are now really saying "we are here for you." And that means anywhere you want us to be. Need a shoulder to lean on? I got two of 'em. We are more than happy to show you around NY. We will welcome you with open arms. We will protect you from other perverts. We will guard the sanctity of the female news reporter. So come to NY Erin, we don't need to use "floories", just our charm.

Thank The Lord You Are Not In This Family

New segment here at I Really Didn't Say: Thanking the Lord That You Aren't Apart of These Families.

Today's Couple/Family - Little Pony - Big Mistake

Could this couple not find another horse? Did they really have to use a mini horse that they may or may not have stolen from Rob&Big? And if no equal size horse could be found, why not just stand the F up?

All valid question. I just thank god I am associated with this couple.

Championship Season Starts Tonight

Tonight on ESPN @8pm EST

The NY Football Giants begin the road to another Super Bowl with their first pre-season game against the Carolina Black Cats.

I know I know, its pre-season. But this is where championships are born. The pre-season is where you plant a seed and watch championship hopes grow and grow. (Plus the Yankees don't play until 10pm est as they are at Oakland).

Ding! Ding! Ding! It's On!

PAGE SIX - SHE made it past third base with Alex Rodriguez, but Kate Hudson isn't getting a warm reception at the plate from Minka Kelly, longtime squeeze of Yankee captain Derek Jeter.
At home games in The Bronx, things between the two photogenic actresses are frostier than the new stadium's $9 beer, according to spies.
"There's been visible coldness between Minka and Kate," an insider told The Post's Lachlan Cartwright. "I don't know if it's a personal thing, or just an extension of the ongoing A-Rod-Jeter rivalry."
Our source added, "People are choosing sides."
"Friday Night Lights" hottie Kelly has been dating Jeter since last year. Since then, she's usually cheered him on from his private seats, kept a low profile and has rarely been photographed with him.
Then, high-profile Hudson arrived on the scene. She's been snapped smooching A-Rod in the stands, and recently switched from sitting in a private box to hanging in the family seats, cheering on the team with Yankee wives including Amber Sabathia and Karen Burnett.
Hudson, who also enthusiastically attended the Bombers' family picnic, seems to have gotten an early thumbs-up from veteran Yankee wives Michelle Damon and Laura Posada, whose stamp of approval is crucial, a source said.
Reps for Hudson and Kelly didn't respond to requests for comment.
Kevin Spence, who ranks player wives and girlfriends on WAGrankings.com, noted: "It would be the best reality show ever if they would allow a camera to follow them around. I think tensions and jealousy will grow in time."

Kevin Spence has the idea of the century. Who wouldn't watch that show if cameras followed around the Yankee wives and girlfriends. Anywho, I really don't care if they like each other or not, as long as they keep their men happy so they can go out and crush the opposition like they currently are.

The real question is...who is the hotter girlfriend? I will leave it up to a vote.